Night Musings

Sometimes my sleep is so deep external stirrings go unnoticed by my unconscious mind.  Other times, like tonight, the slight ping of rain on my windows caused me to wake at 3am.  Granted it's May in Los Angeles, and an unusual time for gray skies and the sound of precipitation.  I try to roll over, go back to my dreams, but I'm awake.  Night table light is on, computer open.  I begin to surf.  The internet is buzzing about the identity of the woman Schwarzenegger had a child with over ten years ago.  I love men, I really do, but I don't comprehend why so many cheat and lie.   Why can't more men be like George Clooney and admit they don't believe in the confines of marriage.  Enjoy long term monogamous relationships or date several girls simultaneously, no one will care if you are honest about your behavior.  Perhaps it takes too much courage to break from a certain traditional image especially when one is one the public eye.  In this case, the beautiful wife hailed from political royalty legitimized his quest.  Photos of them standing arm and arm surrounded by their attractive offspring sold the image Americans seemingly wanted to buy.  These successive scandals make me question what is really going on behind the idealized photograph, and the optimistic realist in me is growing more cynical.  Testimonials about Schwarzenegger's philandering conduct have circulated for years, especially during his campaign.  The press was spun, the tainted image was photoshopped, and the majority of Americans believed the restored image sweeping any doubts about his character under the carpet.  The most tragic figure of all, is the deceived wife.  Maria stood by this version of the truth, and only when her husband was through with his office were the facts revealed.  She ignored the red flags, easy to do I can attest, and for this she will suffer.  My tired brain is distracted by the howling coyotes.  Their loud, penetrating wail echoes in the canyon.  If I turn off my computer now I can still sleep for a few hours before dawn lights the sky outside my windows.