Notorious

At random times during the day or in the seconds before sleep consumed my conscious thoughts,

I'd say a little prayer for Ruth Bader Ginsburg.  

Health reports in the form of breaking news about tumors on her liver or surgery to replace a bile duct stent would make me mumble a quick Hail Mary.

I'd pray she'd make it to finish line and live to see Trump voted out of office.

I'd pray her seat would be filled by a Democratic President.

I'd pray her legacy would be preserved by the highest court in the land.

The other option was too bleak to consider.

But this is 2020 where misery seems to be the only entree on the menu.

I was already bracing myself for a turbulent Fall as we zeroed in on November 3rd.  

Even thought I knew death was circling RGB's chamber, I didn't anticipate this September surprise.

As Ginsburg fought for her life, one that brought unprecedented equality to our democracy, 

I wonder what she envisioned would happen when she passed.  

We know what she feared by her last fervent wish.

I barely had time to process my grief when I was seized by rage.

The hypocrisy of McConnell and Graham and every Republican Senator

who denied Garland's hearing makes bile churn in the deep recess of my stomach.

You may no longer be walking amongst us, RBG, but your impact will never be forgotten. 

I'm a direct recipient of your life's work for which I am forever grateful.

May your memory be a revolution.

Hours after I learned of RBG's death, head spinning and heart heavy, 

I stretched out under the covers longing for a brief interlude of nothingness.

A break from the madness.

My eyes hadn't even closed when a loud rumble sprang from the earth.

Furniture groaned in response to the shifting tectonic plates.

As if a pandemic, fires, floods, civil unrest and our fragile democracy are not enough.

Damn you, 2020!